Sitting in the Doctor’s office, just graduating college, and starting my “adult” life. My Granny, ironically, was sitting next to me, where she always was any time I ever needed her. She casually asked me, “Steph, do you think I am showing signs?” Trying to act like I didn’t know exactly what she was referring to, but my heart I knew. I replied in a questionable manner, “Do I see what sign?” Pausing for several seconds, she never looked over at me, and said “Alzheimer’s?”

My stomach began to ache, and I began to formulate some compassionate answer, as I knew what she wanted to hear. My mind racing with many instances. I began to put them all together, because I already knew. However,this moment put them all in one big poster-sized billboard. So, do I tell her or do I hold it in? I broke the silence, never looking over at her. “Well, Granny, do I think you are showing signs? Yes.” She turned and looked at me with determined conviction, “Well, if I do, I don’t want to know about it.”

Silence.

She then asked what made me think she had “it”.

Where did I start? So, I started with the most recent knowing she was in denial. No example would convince her otherwise, as I was halted with explanatory excuses. If we were going to stop or prevent “it”, something had to be done now.

So, I said “Granny, I love you. I am concerned to what I think you might have. I just want you to go get it checked out. Maybe they can give you something to slow or even prevent “it”, even if it nothing more than aging.” She looked at me with the same stern and determined conviction, and said, “If I have it, I don’t want to know about it.”

Well, my vivacious bestfriend is sitting in a nursing facility today in "it's" final stages. She kept moving forward with deep conviction.“If I have it, I don’t want to know about it.” I guess maybe that was the best way for her.

Stephanie Stevens
San Angelo, TX